Bleh

[nonionay]

Got my first form rejection from my first agent query, which is probably just as well, since I'm in my state of "What the hell am I doing?" pussinboots and kehrli said I should keep querying, since I should get my name out there, but frankly, I'm kind of worried someone will be interested! I don't think I'm ready. I don't want to be one of those people who sell a couple books and then fizzle away. I want to be able to submit the best thing I'm capable of doing. Right now, that's The Blood Rose Devouring. With that in mind, I want to write something in my favorite subgenre (nitty gritty dark fantasy). That has the clean plotting, worldbuilding and character development of Blood Rose, but longer and not >50% sex. Everyone seems to need to write at least seven books before they really get good. What have I got? Two complete novels (one only 55,000 words), one complete novella, 2 mostly done novels, two barely done ones. One short story.

Part of me says to shut up and get in on the Paranormal Romance landslide. The other part looks at Jim Butcher, who seems to be having trouble getting his non-Dresden books bought. I know I need to write what I want. I think my big crisis right now is figuring out what, exactly, that is.

Right now, I'm reading Perdido Street Station (finally) and appreciating the Peake influence. I think I want to do something like that, but with less "salubrious." Right now, I'm imagining something with the grotesque starkness of Gene Wolfe, Mervyn Peake and China Mieville, and... other stuff. Still figuring out what that would be. Probably Umberto Eco's sense of humor.
I need more plot ideas. I should be overflowing with them, but I've only got a few dreams I've jotted down (one of which has been used by The Blood Rose). Time for brainstorming and experimenting. Reading some of the shorts over at www.dailycabal.com was inspiring. I need to let myself experiment.

I really think we (Friday Writing Group) should do some exercises occasionally. Maybe every other week. At this point, I think that would be more valuable to me than getting critiques on old stuff.

Ugh. Stupid sore throat. (Everyone was coughing at Norwescon, though I know I got infected up here) I sound like I've been rubbing testosterone into my forearms.

Comments

[shadowhelm.livejournal.com]

I was one of those hacking, but it is/was allergies.

You should really be looking at submitting stuff. The only way you get published is to write and submit.

[kaerfel.livejournal.com]

I would be way up for exercises, especially since I'm always thinking about doing that kind of stuff but not actually doing it.

I don't know if sending out stuff that people are just going to fire back form rejections for is really getting your name out there. I mean, in theory they won't remember every form reject they send out, if very many at all (and they'll probably only remember the really god awful ones...). Is getting a bunch of rejections going to help you, or is it just going to make you doubt yourself? (Everyone who's bitter and doubts themselves, raise your hand... **me**)

On the other hand, you shouldn't be afraid of success, and you may always tell yourself you're not "ready," but you may never be ready until you actually find yourself in that situation and have to do it. I haven't known you that long, but for what it's worth, I don't think you're the type to just sell a couple books and then fizzle away. -_^